What Does God Delight In?

Warning: this blog shows incredible weakness in myself…this is not meant for me to “show” or “teach” anyone…but to simply share the Holy Spirit’s work in my heart for you all to be challenged and encouraged.

Ah, have you ever woken up in the morning and just had a heavy heart? Not just a feeling of “blah-ness” but a heart that is heavily burdened. Even further, have you ever woken up with a heavy heart and not known why? Monday morning I had one of those occurrences. It’s amazing how frequent they become when heavily involved in ministry. Never would I ever blame God’s calling on my life as a reason for heart problems relating to sin; I have just realized that when heavily involved in God’s work, there is a very real soberness that the Holy Spirit heightens in me related to my sin. It is an incredible blessing but also a very real slap in the face!

Thus, as I woke up from sleeping (which by the way, I love to sleep) my heart felt extremely heavy. I laid in bed for a little bit trying to figure out what the heck was going on. There has been a lot going on in my life for sure, but nothing was going wrong. In fact, quite a lot is going well. Yet, my heart was the heaviest it’s been, at least since I’ve been in ministry (interning). I got up and jumped in the shower to start the day off like I normally do, hoping that my heart was just disappointed in some little thing that I had forgotten about – maybe that I had to make a car payment, pay my phone bill, get gas…something!

As I took a shower I just simply began to pray. (Sorry if you think that’s T.M.I., a lot of my simple conversations with God happen either in the shower or as I’m getting ready for the day.) As I began to pray, I simply asked if God could reveal exactly what was wrong. I began asking questions: do I not trust You? Am I battling an indwelling sin in my life? Do I need to seek someone out to ask forgiveness? I felt like a kid when my dad would call me at lunch time and say, “Ryan, when I get home we’re going to talk.” WHAT?! Did I do something wrong? What’s the deal? I again didn’t figure out what was going on in my heart…I just knew something was wrong.

I drove to the church offices in a “blah” mental/heart state. I arrived and instantly went into our Student Ministry meeting. I sat through the entire 90 minute meeting fully engaged but fully aware that my heart was not in the right place. We finished the meeting and I instantly went into my intern office and sought out God’s word and deep prayer. It was bugging me and it was too much!

As I was in prayer before the throne of our gracious God, it hit me…and I hated it! It took me a bit to figure it all out. I got hit smack in the stomach. Everything hit me…my walk with God, my role in ministry, my leadership and involvement in my relationship with Jessica (my girlfriend)…it was all on edge. I was dissatisfied with everything; with where I was in everything. My walk with the Lord was not at the place I wanted it, my role as an intern was not where I wanted it, and my relationship was not exactly where I wanted it. Nothing in these things was drastically off, bad, or largely serious…what was extremely serious to the point that made my heart SO HEAVY was why these things were not where they should be. God had spoken to me very clearly. “Ryan…YOU ARE PRIDEFUL…dangerously prideful! And it is ruining the amazing gifts and blessings I have given to you.”

Ya, that was NOT at all what I wanted to hear. Dang it! I was so upset. I literally fought it for awhile. I tried to blame the different situations that my pride was affecting – aka blaming the fruit instead of the roots. My heart had become arrogant. I spent the rest of the day fighting, arguing, wrestling with God, not on whether my heart was prideful, but why.

I have struggled my entire life with the amazing blessings and grace God has given to me. He has been so kind, so gracious, and so loving to me and my life. Yet, I always find ways to take those gifts and claim them as mine. This is the exact opposite of the biblical definition of humility. Biblically defined, humility is the habitual heart and mindset of a child of God who feels not solely that he owes all his natural gifts, etc., to God, but that he has been the beneficiary and object of an unmerited redeeming love, and who views himself as being not his own, but God's through Christ’s redemptive work on the cross.

So, I went through the entire rest of the day with a floored, humbled, almost sickly heart before my Savior. I went through the entire rest of the day seeking forgiveness in my heart for being SO arrogant in every aspect of my life.

Earlier in the day I had emailed my mommy and had asked for prayer with my heart and pride. Being the incredible woman of God and phenomenal mother that she is, she sent me a passage in Jeremiah that completely hit home for me. "Thus says the Lord: 'Let not the wise man boast in his wisdom, let not the mighty man boast in his might, let not the rich man boast in his riches, but let him who boasts, boast in this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord'" Jeremiah 9:23-24.

Check out this amazing grace that God works for those who are His. God, in His incredible grace and mercy gives us wisdom, gifts, and many other things! It is not arrogance to accept the gifts God has given nor is it arrogance to declare the gifts God has given. It is pride when we put our identity in those gifts (that aren’t even our own). We are called to find our identity in the amazing love of God, displayed in and through the work of the Cross! I had put my identity and worth in myself and my gifts. I now had to realign that identity and worth and cling desperately to the foot of the Cross!

I definitely had a rough day a couple days ago. The Holy Spirit pretty much shut me down and lowered me like I’ve never been lowered before. I know that practicing humility and putting off pride will be a lifelong process, but I am excited to not boast in my own accomplishments, blessings, and gifting...I’m excited that I CAN’T boast in them. I am excited to turn everything back to the Lord and receive the blessing and delight the Lord gives for those who are humble.

No Sugar Added...or better stated, No Sin Added

“Put to death therefore what is earthly in you…Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience…” Colossians 3:5a;12

As I am currently interning at Cornerstone, I work 3 mornings (Thursday, Friday, and Saturday) at Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf (way better than Starsucks). At this wonderful coffee shop, we use powder for chocolate and vanilla drinks, which are loaded with sugar. Thus, we also have what is called, NSA (no sugar added) powder. Although the regular sugary powder isn’t really that bad for you, people FREAK out and always get this NSA powder stuff! What they don’t really know is that the NSA powder still has some sugar in it…not to mention when people get caramel or other flavored drinks, there is so much other bad stuff it really doesn’t do much good. What’s even more hilarious is when people get NSA powder and then extra whip cream!!! I’m like, “Really?!”

I thought to myself, why do people do this? I realized people do this simply because they love to justify getting a horribly unhealthy drink by adding a “healthier” alternative that doesn’t make the unhealthy part so bad! They are doing a little bit better for sure, but as a whole, the drink is still very unhealthy!

Isn’t this true in our own lives when dealing with our sin? It is for me. I take a struggle that I am going through, a sin issue I am battling, a heart attitude that is ungodly…and I justify it by making it just a little bit less sinful. How many times I ask for NSA to my already sinful “drink,” No SIN Added…but really I should be asking for the No Sin at All drink!! There is a huge difference!!! How many times do we justify our sinful drink with No Sin Added?

Colossians 3 talks about putting off our old self…completely!!! If you look at the list of our earthly fleshly nature, it not only lists some issues, but says “you must put them ALL away”!!! It doesn’t say, “Put some big sin issues away, and add a couple other little ones.” NO!!! It says put them ALL away! Don’t even get the sugary sinful “drink”!

What’s even more convicting in Colossians 3 is the second half. Many times we as Christians get so hung up on the “putting off” that we forget it’s a two-part heart issue. We MUST “put on”! We cannot be satisfied by simply putting off sin, but we must fill our hearts with what God tells us is good, right, just, and glorifying to Him! If we just never get a sinful drink, our cravings for something will overtake us and we will be back in line, ordering another No Sid Added beverage. Not only are we called to not get the “sugary” (sinful) drink, but we are called to get the completely “healthy” God-glorifying drink!

What areas of sin are we justifying? What things do we need to put off? What are we filling our hearts with? Are we content to just get a No Sin Added drink in our lives or are we committed to glorifying God by getting the drink of “love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony”?

“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Are we getting NSA drinks in life or are we not even tasting it and getting the completely healthy drinks in the name of the Lord Jesus?! Trust me, don’t believe the lie that NSA makes the drink healthy…get the drink that is “holy and acceptable before God”…it is WAY healthier!!!

The Glory Days of High School Sports

“All human work which does not begin and end in the Lord Jesus must be a non-success.” C.H. Spurgeon

My dad coached me in every sport and every year since I began playing organized sports. Yet, after my sophomore year when he led my High School team, which he had built and coached since I was in 8th grade, to the championship and lost, my heart grew arrogant towards him as a father and a coach. Both my 8th and 9th grade years we had won the state championship (Junior Varsity). My sophomore year was the first year playing on the Varsity team and we ended the season at 23-4. We dominated teams! As the starting point guard, I thought I was the "man"! Yet, in the state finals we got outplayed and out-coached – and I was furious. I led the team in scoring throughout the playoffs and was our leading scorer in the championship game. Obviously the loss was not my fault, but the coach’s! Well, at least that's what I thought!

This led to a very horrible off-season that ended with my dad's resignation as head coach. Thus, I played under a different coach for the first time in my life that year and realized, “It wasn’t the coach…it was my own pride that lost the game.” After my junior year, which ended the same as the previous year (losing in the state finals), I sat down with my dad and sought forgiveness for my pride and actions. I told him that I would play for nobody but him. After accepting my apology and forgiving me he asked me a question that has forever stuck in my head. He didn’t point fingers and tell me off, he didn't say, "I told you so." He simply said, “Ryan, you have to ask yourself this question…are you humble enough to ________? Ryan, are you humble enough to win a championship?” Right then and there I knew that question was going to define my life. Every endeavor in my life I knew I was going to ask myself the question, “Am I humble enough to ________?”

So, my senior year I switched teams and played for a private school with my dad as the head coach. We dominated again that year going 19-5 and even beat the #1 team in the state (we were the only team to do it). Yet, throughout the season, that question was on my mind. I definitely had arrogant moments/games, but the question was always there. We made it to the state finals again…we played a team we had never beaten. We outplayed them in the first half. We were tied at the end of the 3rd quarter. We fell apart in the 4th and lost the game…but here’s the God part.

With about 90 seconds left in the game, down by 15, I got fouled and went to the line to shoot 2 free-throws. I looked over at our bench and saw the 5 guys who had barely played all season and would probably never play in a championship game like this again. Here I was, a seasoned high school player with an amazing high school career that I was blessed to have. I asked myself in that moment, “Am I humble enough to win or LOSE a championship?”

My teammate approached me before the free-throws, “Are you going to miss the second free-throw on purpose?” I turned to my dad and yelled, “Put all 5 guys in the game…I’m making both free-throws!” I did, he did, and we lost the game. It was the hardest moment in my high school athletic career. My last game. My last chance. The way people would remember me going out...yet, my dad’s question had wrecked my heart…I had learned to be humble in my athletic experiences.

Here’s the point: in our lives, in our interactions, in our pursuit of living for God, we MUST ask ourselves the question, “Am I humble enough to ______?” When that question dominates our thoughts and hearts, it doesn’t matter our success or failure. What matters is if our heart is correctly postured towards God in a humble way. “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” Are you humble enough?

Better than I deserve,

Ryan Lambros